There is nothing like a vacation. The to-do lists go away, the nagging "should" voices quiet, and time seems to slow down. Spontaneous walks and naps are welcomed rather than resisted. A latte at a café is a sensory experience to remember, rather than a hurried and even guilty pleasure.
Writing vacations are especially fun for me. Recently, my friend Vivian and I traveled to her house in upstate New York... for five glorious days we lounged on the couch and read, brainstormed about ideas in front of the fire and sipped warm, comforting teas while pecking away at our laptops. When the desire for a break came on, without hesitation we'd drop everything and take a walk in the snow, the fresh air and glorious views refreshing every aspect of ourselves.
Why does a day filled with the same activities seem entirely different when I'm back at home? I feel guilty for reading when I "should" be writing. I berate myself as unfocused when running out for a coffee. When I do allow myself to take a walk, I spend the time wondering how much I have or will accomplish that day.
It's never enough, by the way. What's more, it's always less than what I achieve when I'm on vacation.
What's going on here?
As opposite as our "real" and "holiday" lives may seem, there is really only one thing that differentiates them. It's not location; many "upstaters" flock to the city for a getaway. Nor is it circumstantial; dissatisfied with our "real lives" as we may be, our attitudes and perspectives travel with us and in time reveal themselves, even in the most ideal of locations.
What differentiates the two is perspective.
When we're at home, we're surrounded by a set of expectations -- our own and those of other people -- that we have taken on in the interest of being successful. And we imagine that rigid determination and dogged persistence will somehow create the conditions necessary for this success, productivity and even creativity to unfold.
We think by working harder -- and often, being harder on ourselves -- that somehow more will get done.
What we miss in this view is that the time, energy and attention required to create and maintain such vigilance takes away from the ability to actually accomplish anything. To say nothing of the additional stress that reduces, rather than rejuvenates, the mind's ability to imagine and create.
A vacation, therefore, is far more than an occasional respite from the real world. It is a state of mind that is always available; an invitation to escape self-criticism and expectation and surrender into the present moment. And then this one. And then this one.
Counterintuitive as it might seem, this state is the precise environment that breeds productivity, as well as pleasure, peace and playfulness. If you want all four, whether working or playing, it's time to consider a permanent trip...
is a voice coach and counselor specializing in technical and emotional issues that interfere with self-expression. Based in New York City, Jennifer works in private practice with musicians and non-musicians alike to discover, develop and confidently release their best personal, professional and creative potential. Her clients include Grammy, CMA, Emmy and Tony award-winners, as well as corporate clients across an array of industries.